Achieving Goals | adversity | Men's Coaching
[easy-share buttons="facebook,twitter,linkedin,mail,print" counters=0 native="no"]

Feeling Stuck? 5 Reasons Why A Coach or Mentor Will Help You Breakthrough in 2018

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.”

-Henry David Thoreau

There is a silent, stifling apathy within too many men today. Most guys have thrown in the towel on their goals of living a BIG life in their career, relationships and health.

Just what is the typical man like today? The answer is usually either passive, full of rage or bored out of his skull. He has no opposing force to fight, takes no risks and has no accountability to other men.

Men of the past had a battle to fight, an adventure to live and a beauty to rescue.  Think of William Wallace (Braveheart), Maximus (Gladiator) and Leonidas (300) –  They embodied the manly values of strength, courage, mastery and honor.  They had a purpose, displayed selflessness and fought for what they believed in. Their lives mattered.

The average guy today is: overweight, working a job he despises, in an unfulfilling relationship and in debt up to his eye balls.

The numbers speak for themselves:

74% of men are overweight or obese

80% of suicides are men

43% of children live without their fathers

50% of marriages end in divorce

42% of men abuse alcohol or drugs

87% of men are “not engaged” or “actively disengaged” in their job or occupation

What the hell happened? Where did all the real men go?

You would think that men would reach out for support but they usually don’t.

If you study the most successful men of all time, they all had a coach or mentor that guided them to higher levels of success:

-Michael Jordan had Phil Jackson and Dean Smith

-Warren Buffett had Benjamin Graham

-Conor McGregor has John Kavanaugh

-Tony Robbins had Jim Rohn

-Alexander the Great had Aristotle

If you want to be great, you can’t do it alone. The first place to start is to decide what you want for your life and then find someone to learn from that has achieved the results that you are after.

A coach or mentor that has seen success can show you the path to better health, a stronger mindset, richer relationships and a more fulfilling life.

Here are the top 5 areas that a coach or mentor empowers you as a strong man.

1.) You lack a purpose or mission in life

At the core of every man is the need for a cause, a mission or a battle to fight. Something noble to strive, bleed and possibly die for.

If you’re like most men, you’ve never taken a step back to ask “What do I really want as a man in all aspects of my life?”

Instead, you slog through a mundane job Monday through Friday, living for the weekend and medicating yourself with drugs/alcohol/food or porn.

You unconsciously follow the crowd and turn to consumption to fill the void. Cars, clothes or vacations to get a quick fix of happiness – a sugar high that lasts a few days and then vanishes.

You used to play sports, train and go to the gym daily – now it’s living vicariously through other men doing it on TV. Many men spend more time on their fantasy football team than they do with their wives/girlfriends or going to the gym.

Sadly this is a reality for most men today. No purpose or place. Life on the sidelines or in the stands watching life pass you by.

A coach asks you the tough questions and helps you get crystal clear on your purpose and empowers you to find your path to more meaning. They call you out of the soft, comfortable life on the couch and into the arena where you will fight for a cause, find your drive and discover a life worth living.

“The more you seek the uncomfortable, the more comfortable you will become.” – Conor McGregor

2.) Heavy Accountability

When you commit to doing something and give your word to someone you respect – you do it, plain and simple.

Being a strong man of integrity means sticking to your word and doing what you said you were going to do, even when (especially when) it’s difficult.

Excuses won’t fly and there’s nowhere to hide. You get called out on the bullshit limiting beliefs you’ve held onto for so long and start to see what’s possible.

All of us greatly underestimate what we are truly capable of which leads to realizing far less than our full potential. A coach won’t let you get away with small thinking and going halfway towards your fitness, career, relationship or financial goals.

Heavy accountability will push you to get out of your head, out of your comfort zone and into taking massive action towards your biggest goals. We get one shot at this life and there’s no time to play small.

3.) You need someone else besides your clueless guy friends to discuss your life and goals with

Do your closest friends have the kind of health, wealth, relationships and lives that you want? Are they pursuing the best version of themselves?

Most guys are content with the mediocre – the job that just pays the bills, a body that isn’t horrible but nothing to be proud of, a relationship with a significant other that’s convenient but lacks passion and a life that is all together less than exciting.

If you surround yourself with friends that are average, you will be too. It’s a cliché but it’s true, you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.

Iron sharpens iron and strong men challenge each other and inspire each other to greater levels. Average guys think striving for more is weird and uncomfortable.

It’s time to expect more from your male relationships.

Having a coach gives you the support and accountability of a successful man that doesn’t ask you to play small to keep from being “different” – they do the opposite and demand that you grow and achieve significance. Wanting to be better isn’t uncomfortable or weird, it’s mandatory. Fear of judgement or thinking that struggling with an issue will be met with a statement like “Just be a man!” is replaced by open, supportive dialogue and real solutions.

Eagles don’t cluck with the chickens, they soar with fellow eagles.

4.) You want to figure it out on your own rather than asking for help

It’s no secret that men are often stubborn. Rather than risk looking weak and admitting they don’t have all the answers, most guys will plow forward trying to figure things out on their own.

Let’s say that you want to learn Jiu Jitsu. If you approached Jiu Jitsu like most guys approach their goals, you would go to a park and start flailing around, kicking and punching the air. No plan. No end game. No methodology. No instruction. No results.

Not only is this stupid, it’s flat out inefficient. The fastest way to do anything is to find someone that is where you want to be or has done what you want to do and model their behavior and thought patterns. Rather than getting arrested for scaring small children in a park, you drive to a Jiu Jitsu gym and get instruction from someone that can coach you to your desired outcome.

Almost anything you want is achievable if you: 1) Define it. 2) Get help on how to achieve it 3) Work your ass off to get it. If you skip #2, you might get there from sheer effort but you can also walk from San Francisco to New York instead of flying.

5) You have a big vision for your life but you are playing small

I know a lot of guys that want to start a business, build an amazing relationship with the woman of their dreams or claim their ideal level of fitness.

The sad truth is that most of them probably will never do any of these things because they are playing small.

They are stuck in their comfort zone.

Warm and cozy in their bed at 6:30am instead of completing a 60 minute workout and finishing a healthy breakfast by the time most guys wake up.

Stuck on the couch, glued to their fantasy football app instead of developing relationships with high level guys.

Illuminated by the screen of their laptop as they watch porn rather than seeking to build authentic relationships with women.

Feeling stuck and comfortable rather than taking action is impossible when you hire a men’s coach. Playing small isn’t allowed and you are constantly challenged to live up to your potential.

Your coach knows how to lift you up to another level and challenges you beyond what you believe is possible. Similar to a coach in sports that pushes you in a practice or a grueling workout, you may hate him in the moment – but it’s this push out of your comfort zone where growth takes place and results are achieved.


Admitting that you want more for your life and realizing that you don’t have all the answers can be hard – but what’s the alternative? To continue living in a suspended state, staying in your comfort zone and playing small? Life is too short for that and we all have only one at bat.

Once you make the decision to aggressively go after your goals and hire a coach that’s achieved things that you want to achieve, things start to change.

It’s uncomfortable at first, but you begin taking small actions in the right direction.

You follow the plan that you and your coach decide upon to get closer to your goals.

You start achieving some small wins.

Momentum starts building.

Before you know it, positive shit starts happening in your life as good decisions and discipline compound.

The weekly calls keep you accountable, on track and deliver new challenges that keep you leveling up.

You stick with the program, continuing to take action and executing the game plan.

Before long, you have better health, wealth and relationships but more importantly, you are more evolved, a better version of yourself – a more powerful and more successful man.

Are you ready to get out of the stands and into the area?

Learn more about our coaching services here.